Sunday, 15 March 2015

Friday the 13th: A Nude Beginning

Another porno, it seems he really can't stay away from that stuff. Probably because he's single and has nothing else to do but jack off into a sock while he cries over a photo of his waifu. Or he is probably playing "catch" in the backyard with the guys, yeah apparently Brad Jones is bisexual. Didn't see that coming, anyway let's get to the actual video which is just another shallow attempt at trying to get people to think there's nekked people in the video. Morons...just like the Cinema Snob.

For some reason he tries to rationalize the plot of the movie even though it's a porno for crying out loud, is he expecting Casablanca? Then for some reason during the video he equivocates Siskel and Ebert to god and christ, where the hell does he come off making that kind of statement. But then again Brad Jones hates christianity so he'll take any attempt to bash them, what did his local priest molest him, or did his dad? Maybe that is where he skewered vision of reality comes from, maybe that is why he relies to drugs to relieve himself.

The bald bastard himself, I would have chosen the yellow bastard but the Frank Miller would sue me. 

At the start of the video, he pretends he's doing a video on the actual Jason movie but instead says he's doing a porno. Hilarious, it's not like we already knew that, the comedic timing of a dead man. Then he shows  pretentious clips of Siskel and Ebert and basically glory holes them, because we all know that he worships them like the Emperor from Warhammer 40K. And he doesn't even start talking about the porno until five minutes into the video, then goes through it TGWTG style and it really shows how bad his comedic talents really are when he takes jabs at political parties. But then again "Political jabs are a sign of desperation for a joke",  so are blowjob jokes, the lamest kind. And I haven't even mentioned his shitty Tequila and Bonetti sketch, he must really be desperate to create another meme after his last one died. And for some reason the comments section is filled with people arguing about feminism, like they actually got offended by that scene.

Check out some comments:

Agreed.

Hell yeah, there's so much truth here.
Why the hell would he review those shitty movies?



6 comments:

  1. check out the cinderella video if you want to see how pathetic and nuts jake really is, dude should be lockedaway behind bars

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  2. Jake is officially no longer a contributor to the site. They're being real cryptic about it too. Either he pissed somebody off at CA or there was some kind of falling out with the main man.

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    1. Yeah, I heard about that. People are saying that it was Brad's new girlfriend but it's too early to say what ti really was.

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  3. Yeah bisexuality is a lot more common than most think.

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  4. "Hausu" is in the Criterion Collection and would get way over Cinema Snob's head. He'd just say "WTF" to everything in the movie (it's a weird one).

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