Friday, 30 November 2012

Son of Sleepaway Camp

This review was just meh so it wasn't all bad but could have been better so I will point some of that out and what he could have said or done. It could have been the movie that he reviewed or it could have just been his performance this but but overall I think it was a bit of both. First off let me start with I HATE THESE POPUPS.

Don't know who the hell this idiot is and I don't care

At 01:14 he mentions FernGully: The Last Rainforest so what did he have to meet his quota on others movies that other people in TGWTG's have reviewed. At 02:34 he starts to mention other movies that have son in them but those movies titles are not alternate titles and some of those are actual sequels to others movies and not only related because of the title which makes Brad wrong for mentioning them unless he though it was funny but it was just kinda stupid to do so. Let me start with Son of the Mask which is one of the worst movies that I have saw but at least it is a sequel although a standalone one which is more than I can say for Son of Sleepaway camp which is only related to the other movies by alternate title only. I could also say the same thing about Son of Godzilla which at least a Godzilla movie which makes it related to the other movies which again something I can't say about Son of Sleepaway camp.

At 04:48 he mentions something I don't know but he could have said Poochinski but he was probably like that after and then oh yea I could have said that but oh well I'll just mention it later on in the video because he probably that that people though he would mention it. At 06:35 he said insaneoman which doesn't bring up anything on Google but at first glance anyone would have said look it's Yor the Hunter from the Future. To further say that he should have mentioned this is the fact that he knows Spoony one so he should have known what he has done and then Yor would have sprung to mind but it didn't which was sad to hear as I was expecting him to say it.
Yors World
Around 07:54 there are snakes but he could have said Snakes why does it have to be Snakes, I hate Snakes which is from Indiana Jones which he should have mentioned but he didn't as that would have been better to say than what he said. Mentioning Eric Cartman from South Park around 09:04 wasn't funny and neither were many other jokes as he should improve on making jokes, not that all of them weren't funny though. At 09:40 Charles Bronson appears (Death Wish) not the criminal though but Brad should have said and "Charles Bronson opens the door" but he didn't, instead he made another lame joke but at least he say's Charles Bronson later on in the video but still he should have said it when he first appears. At 10:07 he said I should make a VCR joke but since he owns them he didn't but that doesn't mean you can't still make a joke as he should have so he should do in the future. At 11:57 he mentions he has a fetish of shitting on peoples backs, no wonder why he got divorced.
Honey can I shit on your back
At 15:38 he says that isn't the music from sleepaway camp and says that doesn't this music suit better but I don't remember that music from his Sleepaway camp reviews or is it from something else. At 16:18 he said wandering Tommy Wiseau so what did he have to meet his quota again from TGWTG's and he doesn't look like Tommy Wiseau in that part so just look at this image and see for yourself.

Not Tommy Wiseau
After he mentions that those guys find Jesus's resting place but that is on another continent, just for a joke I know but highly inaccurate and not funny. Around 17:07 there is no music and he mentions that but he should have inserted music himself like in his earlier reviews which is what he should have done here. At 17:24 the fat guy falls on a spike trap but Brad didn't say anything when he should have said he fell on a Vietnamese spike trap from Vietnam, you know the ones which have shit covered all over them so if you survive falling on them you will still be infected with some form of disease, no one.

Later he mentions that people can't find him although he is in plain sight but remember they don't know what he looks like and he is also a human which could make people  mistake him for a regular person. At 19:03 he says it has a bigger budget than any of the other sleepaway camps I guess, just remember it also has a bigger budget than the Cinema Snob Movie which just goes to show. At 20:39 the old guy stay's behind but he could have showed a clip of predator where a guy does the same in that and then that part of his review would have been funny or do I have to fix it for him.

Overall the review is ok but not great as he could have made it much better by doing some of the things mentioned in this article so take notice Brad and improve for next time. It doesn't mean that their isn't any funny moments but the bad outweighed the good. Also I would just like to state that this review was done weeks ago and only uploaded recently to have a update for the site, you can tell by the style of Brad's haircut in the video as it is totally different from his hair in Max Force claims The Cinema Snob is "Filth" which goes to show the time difference from when they were both filmed. Watch out for my next article when Brad puts up another review.

Just see the difference in his hair cut

Thursday, 29 November 2012

Drunk El Topo Chico & Friends, Plus New Video

The video was kinda funny so it wasn't all bad but I will just point out some things. First off I would just like to say that I hate those popups of people from TGWTG's group as I really don't like them and are annoying when appearing while you are watching the video. Here is a pic to show you.

God I hate that guy
About El Topo Chico's costume, he looks like a cross between Tony Soprano because of the white bathrobe and Rey Mysterio due to the Mexican wrestling mask.

The way he talks sounds like Mr krabs from spongebob squarepants or the Bum from the Nostalgia critic so that's not a bad thing. When they are all drinking it doesn't seem like they want to drink the drinks like who would but they should actually chug the drinks for the video as Ed Glaser just sipped the bottle which was kinda lame. Adding audio over when he is walking past the crowd as seen below was not really that funny as it would have been more funny to have seen the crowds reaction to him as he walked by.

Watch out when drinking drinks from mexico as by not reading the label you could mistakenly be drinking Mexican deep throat. When brad said I was expecting way worse and farted into a tequila bottle I though he was going to say Mexican deep throat as that would have been funny as he mentioned that in one of his brad tries videos. El Topo Chico say pretty white lady but that sounds more like it would come from a native american than a Mexican so did they get mixed up.

I really don't like this creepy comment as it could give anyone nightmares.

Anonymous wrote:

Please tell me there is a part 2 that is nothing but El Topo Chico fucking Ed Glaser.
And now everyone barfs into the nearest bin after reading that comment. Nobody wants to see part 2 even if it is on the premium section of the site. At the halfway mark it says El Topo Chico will be right back but they was no mid video as which I though would appear but Cinema Snob doesn't do that with his video's which is a good thing unlike the Nostalgia critic who stopped doing episodes which made alot of people PO but that's unrelated to this blog.

El topo tries to steal Ninja the mission force DVD's but who the hell would want that piece of crap because I watched it all and it was bad, like Nukie bad. I know they tried doing something different but I didn't like it as it didn't work for me as it wasn't funny.

Stealing DVD's, oh El Topo
At the end El Topo mentions an orgy, because Mexicans always do orgy's? Some people may think El Topo to be a bit racist or discrimination to Mexicans but not as much as Irate Gamer on his road trip bloopers. Go to 2:12 and watch from there.

This was from the horror hound weekend which was over a week ago but we all know that Brad loves to keep videos from us so he can update every once in a while which has both good and bad aspects of it like when he put up a Bruno Mattei Show episode that was recorder over a year before he uploaded it. Well that's all for today but I will leave you with this, I told you about those homo vibes.

I also did another video so check that out if your interested.

Tuesday, 27 November 2012

Official Blog Teaser Trailer

That's right it happened and you can view it right here on the blog. The most awesome video ever right here on the internet advertising the Cinema Snob Sucks Blog.

People pretending to be me and trying to find out where I am

It's really sad for those people pretending to be me and then putting in their own responses to act like they are right. They are even more stupid when they post wrong information that they probably dug up by a Google search. Here's what he posted

Birdies wrote:
Guys guys, don't trash Pearse on the forums. You could try to get in touch with him at 028-9024-5133 or maybe stop by University Road, Belfast BT7 1NN, United Kingdom. I probably should have said hi to him when I was over at the MacDonald Hill Valley Golf & Spa.
This is just a fraction of what we've found. Don't worry, we'll post more.
Let me just correct this 028-9024-5133 is not my Phone number and saying that maybe you could stop by University Road, Belfast BT7 1NN is also wrong because I have never attended a University before or even lived in that location which shows that they are even more stupid. Hey Birdies good luck on finding out more information about me, hope you aren't this guy though.

Another person even said

MegN wrote:
I want more! You don't fuck with the fans.
Oh im really scared now, gonna have trouble sleeping from now on. Remember because you can't mess with Cinema Snob's fans because Brad Jones is like a God to them, so they mean he is like Apophis from Stargate posing as a false god.

People even replied back to them saying that there search was quite useless but see that post for yourself.

grmpf wrote:
Well, that was quite useless. All you did was post the phone number and address of the University of Belfast. Among the 25,000 students and 3,900 employees, I'm sure the rabid fans will get him in a heartbeat.
Btw, are you sure cyberstalking some douchebag and linking to your online service business (something that requires users to trust in its owner respecting their privacy) at the same time is a good idea?
octo7 also had something to say and it is true seeing as I grew up in Belfast and live there so I can confirm that you idiots wouldn't last a few minutes. 

octo7 wrote:
Go to University Road Belfast and see how long you last lol ;. I used to live in Belfast, they shoot people in the knees there for fun, a prissy little internet nerd like you wouldn't last five minutes in that city.
He also said after that he's starting to regret paying half price for the DVD as who wouldn't after reading my previous post where you could buy something so much better for slightly more or around the same price.

octo7 wrote:
In all honesty I'm starting to regret even paying half price for mine now.
In the end we all know who was pretending to be me, Brad Jones himself and his multi personality disorder posting as multiple people actually talking to himself. Anyhow see you again next time Cinema Snob Sucks Fans and Cinema Snob fans as seen below.

Warning snob fans are of a disgusting nature

Monday, 26 November 2012

You know what I want for Christmas since it's Cyber Monday

The Cinema Snob Movie NOT

It's that time of the year and you know what that means. Im making a list, checking it twice, not gonna buy anything naught or nice, Cinema Snob Movie is not coming to my town. Oh wow you know what I really want for Christmas, a shitty independent low budget film because that's what really adds a sparkle to my Christmas presents.

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, the cinema snob movie on DVD and then I smashed her head in for wasting $14.30 (Including Shipping) on a shitty independent film. You know what the worst part is, I wanted some Irate Gamer DVD's instead. Ugh but what can I do now but burn the DVD in my fire and hope it can at least do something useful than be an eyesore in my DVD collection. Im pretty sure im not gonna smell the DVD unlike those other weirdos so why not burn it.

But everyone hurry up as you can only get it today for $10 (Without shipping) or you'll have to pay $20 (Again without shipping) for it which is extortion and some others also have something to say about this. Don't worry because I'll add my own though on this.

ohe wrote:
$20 is extortion? Where do you get off telling people to get a life when you yourself clearly don't even have a job?
octo7 wrote:
I'm glad I got it for half the price of a moron like you who tries to quantify internet fandom. Get a life, loser. 20 bucks was an extortionate price for a self-distributed film with zero budget.
Pearse Hillock wrote:
Sweet Jesus $20 without shipping if your not ordering today, that's alot of money and just think about it. Were in the middle of a recession and your still gonna charge use $20 for it, then again what about those tax hikes that could come in. What a joke as there is much else you could buy with the money.
There are many other things you could buy with that money on Cyber Monday such as this Genuine Freshwater White Pearl Necklace Bracelet & Earring Set with 86% off costing you only $13.

A PNY Attache III 32 GB USB 2.0 Flash Drive with 78% off costing you again only $13.

Apple Jacks Cereal 3 Pack, Umm tasty. Wouldn't you rather have this for only $14.

An 18" Sterling Silver Wishbone Pendant with 77% off costing you only $15, that looks like a really nice present so why wouldn't you want this.

It really sucks about these offers since im in the UK but anyway I hope I have convinced you to buy something else than the Cinema Snob movie. Thanks to amazon for providing these amazing gifts so get to it.

Saturday, 24 November 2012

Brad admits/hints about his gay sex relationship with Jerrid and Jake

What a scoop, he himself posted and mentioned about him and Jerrid living together. So does that mean those poker games are true and what other juicy secrets will now unfold. Here's my version of the story, Jillian left Brad and Brad needs a replacement for her so he gets Jerrid to live with him and makes him dress up in Jillian's clothing so he can pretend that he is a woman like what they do in prison. He forces Jerrid to do this or he'll be out on the streets going to the soup kitchen everyday.

Being married to Brad probably was like prison anyhow and now Jerrid is trapped. Oh the horror as now they'll have to adopt children or do that scientific thing where the man can have the baby like in that episode of sliders. This is shocking indeed but where does this put Jake, they all get together and play the worst drinking game ever and magically end up in a big orgy of dudes. That's how he got involved all those years ago.

This is also shocking but not as shocking as these leaked images showing jerrid in women's clothes.

Warning these images are of a disturbing nature

It's was really sad when Brad commented and said that he doesn't play poker with the boys but he doesn't understand what I meant by that. Here it's ok brad because I have Ice T here to explain it for you, I even had to contact him and he was saddened due to the face you are doing the same things those guys in that episode of law and order were doing but it seems that you are lying to yourself about the gay sex you've been having with you male friends.

Check this article and look down to number 3
The murder of a prosecutor leads the SVU team to investigate a group of dudes who play poker every week. And by poker, I mean that they're really meeting up to have anal sex on the sly. But the detectives never would have figured this out if it wasn't for the street smarts of Ice-T, who generously gives his workmates an insight into this homoerotic African-American sexual secret. Known as "the down low,"
Jerrid went down first since his cup had the roofie so party time
After getting jerrid's ass they wonder which of them is next
Chug away because either way one of you is getting raped
Jerrid didn't like taking one for the team and neither did Brad but you know what happens when you play poker and drinking games so it seems that Jake was the survivor of this round

The Start of the Cinema Snob Sucks Blog

There is the Irate Gamer Sucks blog and now there is the Cinema Snob Sucks Blog so brace yourself for the creation of another sucks blog. The main reason for me doing this is because the Cinema Snob hit me with copyright on YouTube for simply uploading his video's to allow people there to view them as certain people cannot or have trouble watching them on blip. That includes me and many others but blip really sucks and the main reason why internet reviewers use it is to make money but that's not what it is all about but many see it that way especially TGWTG which are affiliated with Brad Jones (Child Molester Extraordinaire) and his Jimmy Savile ways.We all now know the real reason he goes to those food fairs and carnivals.

Just see the resemblance, like father like son and Josef Fritzl would agree. I interviewed him myself and he said he was in touch with Cinema Snob if you know what I mean. A whole new pedio love triangle revealed only on Cinema Snob Sucks Blog. Stay tuned for more on this breaking internet story.

Here is just a couple of reasons why I think Cinema Snob Sucks

First off he deletes comments on his own site like a Nazi, probably because he's been watching too much Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS. Maybe one two Nazi exploitation film been too much for him and now there's a rumor that he reads Mein Kampf before he goes to sleep everyday. Scary stuff I know because someone may have to make a shitty American History X rip off someday just to let the world know.

No wonder why he always reviews Nazi moves and references Hitler. Im starting to think that he has saw that tv movie where Robert Carlyle plays Hitler and thought it was a good idea.

Second he thinks he is a good actor when he is really pretty terrible, I mean really have you guys saw paranoia because I have and it sucked badly. People say he took stuff from American Psycho (a good movie) but he said he wrote the script before he saw the film but then again why does he say "take that Patrick Bateman" in the behind the scenes. Makes you wonder if he is lying. His movies/video's are really an orgy  of trashy, low quality 500 bit rate pixelated videos and AVGN's child films are probably better than the shit he pumps out. 

Third he only puts his video's on blip so he can sit on his fat ass and receive money by making his viewers watch advertisements which they can't skip unlike YouTube where you can and are not forced to watch them or even watch another ad at the halfway mark. It's not like he even tries to upload them elsewhere and when someone else does he forces them to take them down so they cannot take away from his income.

Fourth he is an ass in real life and pushes away his friends like when that event happened with Jerrid he just more or less told him to buzz off and your not my friend anymore when they were friends for so long but that doesn't count for anything to him as even if your friends for more than 6 years he'll just throw you away like a dirty pair of underwear. The may be back as friends now but we all know what really happened, Brad's wife caught Brad, Jerrid and Jake playing poker but we all really know what they were doing. Shocking indeed and so are these pictures.

I think she wants a divorce and jerrid didn't take the bad news too well as they won't be able to play poker any more
Maybe this is the real reason why Jillian left him as she couldn't stand him watching porn all day and these late night poker games he's been having with the boys. This is really shocking harsh news that has only been recently found out, my sources tell me that there are more juicy details that were too extreme to be put on this blog and also one image which could only appear censored as the bottom half of the image has been cut off to hide who is below.

Hey wait were's brad, oh oh no wonder why they're both smiling.
Maybe they shouldn't have taken that Kodak moment.
Fifth alot of his video's appear to be how can I say this, NOT FUNNY. I mean can't he do better, it's not like he gets his jokes from these guys. No but seriously I didn't even laugh once at any of his recent videos as possibly he's lost his touch like Irate Gamer after his first video and so ends the first entry in the Cinema Snob Sucks Blog.

More on this at a later date on the seedy underworld of the REAL Brad Jones.